This isn’t about holes in 60 denier tights
that have nestled moth balls through 9 month nights
repudiating Texan heat with fierce hopeful yarn
no, this isn’t about them, that, flotsum
nor the tangles in your hair from making love
unexpectedly, listening, late to emigrate birds cooing
as your skin turns from gold to lemon, through filters of real and false
this isn’t about trying to remove the pain
with a butter knife and finding only blunt trace
how the ache inches further, as vanishing scars still blister
our passports resting on a pile of books, unread
as if the only choice is consume or flee
before doors get battoned and children
forget the chubby cheeked youth they trade for blue light
where he will never call again
communing with worm, hummus and lost acorn
no, I already know, an advance on premonition
his death will wrought my disintegration
so, we dance today because today is the only day left
before the world turns crimson and gives up its underbelly
all the cut-out pains of old, where your photo should have hung
are emptied walls with the smell of petricor
this isn’t about loss, this is about mirrors felted out of focus
I stand nude watching words describe years on dermis
feeling you behind me trying to gain admittance
haven’t you read about frosted drinks who claim no ice?
people who cannot trust, even the thinnest owning?
We both know if I turn, you won’t be there, you won’t be there
I swear I hear you sigh and murmur this isn’t about losing
memory touches me with your hands, your mouth, I blink
sightless, feeling by touch, where the knife sunk deepest
the weight of carrying you in my heart where death defies passing
Orpheus swallows his coin, depths beckon their sensual consumption
Charon sliding his oar through the water of Styx as if it were softened glass
today is the only day left, tomorrow proffers no do-over
a length of mourning is always defined by the survivor.
4 Replies to “Today is the only day left”
There is so much truth in this poem.
You write well!
I appreciate you saying so, very much.
I really appreciate you
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