Remember when they used to bug your phone
The sound of rolling open polymer handpiece
Secrets folded in purring circle
Click, click, can aches be fixed?
What if you died
And left me a note
What would it say?
Who stands as muse
Now life has fled, her stockings shred
And bottles are emptied without drinking
I think the blood of us is watching
The shard of darkness cutting swaths of fracture across your face
Full days don’t exist
Come back here
To the light beneath the door
What does it do to beckon from shadow
If you paint from a photo, you capture no movement
Just faces in gouache
Stainless steel and fascimile reflection
A few minutes fooling ourselves
Nothing was sacred
Not even one thing?
If the lie was eaten
Did it vanquish all the time I spent, believing it
Was I the lie?
Inhabiting falsehood and words that curled like suppliant flesh
Weren’t you there with the needle?
Obsession
The other players were faking
Plunge the sharp, feel holy numbness
I’d follow you into the hollowed mountain of your madness and my error
For of emptied places only, you reign
Heartless and ready to start over new
As if nobody had existed and nothing was sacrificed
Memory in hose and mask plays her tricks
Writes a new damask script
And obedient
You condemn
Throw me tender under bus
With falsehoods and generalization
It feels like it did the first time
That’s when I knew
And still
I let you in, to scouge and vanquish, remove me by rubbing
Those promises
I didn’t beg for them
You gave freely in pretend
Though each one wasn’t meant
Then you went to church with a clear conscience
Because only Catholics have to repent
I was an addict and I didn’t know
My drug was you. My drug was you
My drug was you. My drug was you